Is It Worth It?

Do you ever have those moments where you wonder, “Does my life actually have any kind of purpose? Is any of this even worth it?”

It’s probably not kosher for a missionary to admit, but over the last 9 years, I’ve asked myself, “What in the world am I doing?” more than I care to count. I’ve experienced a thousand and one occasions where I’ve absolutely wanted to throw in the towel and call it quits.

Yet at the end of the day, something – Someone – always pulls me back.

Tonight, it happened as I was sifting through months and months of old photos. I sat at my desk and reacquainted myself with a million precious memories from years gone by. And kind of like those weeks after childbirth, the painful remembrances started falling away, leaving these golden moments, split seconds of goodness forever frozen in time. Each photo roars back at me a resounding “YES!” It is absolutely worth it all!

I loved my bygone mornings of quickly chugging fresh coffee made by Marielis’ mom at our Cabeza bus stop
It was special to watch this little one share the Good News with this older gentlemen as she explained the gospel meaning of each of her colored beads on her bracelet
Talking to Reynabel about how to be a good gal at school – and watching the wheels turn as she considered whether or not it would be a good idea to obey. 🙂

Praise the Lord! Despite each moment of weariness, disappointment, injustice, frustration, loneliness, confusion, sadness, and pain, He is worth it all!


Oft times the day seems long, our trials hard to bear,
We’re tempted to complain, to murmur and despair;
But Christ will soon appear to catch His Bride away,
All tears forever over in God’s eternal day.

It will be worth it all when we see Jesus,
Life’s trials will seem so small when we see Christ;
One glimpse of His dear face all sorrow will erase,
So bravely run the race till we see Christ.

Sometimes the sky looks dark with not a ray of light,
We’re tossed and driven on, no human help in sight;
But there is one in heav’n who knows our deepest care,
Let Jesus solve your problem – just go to Him in pray’r.

Life’s day will soon be o’er, all storms forever past,
We’ll cross the great divide, to glory, safe at last;
And we’ll all share the joys of heav’n – a harp, a home, a crown,
The tempter will be banished, we’ll lay our burden down.

It will be worth it all when we see Jesus,
Life’s trials will seem so small when we see Christ;
One glimpse of His dear face all sorrow will erase,
So bravely run the race till we see Christ.

– Esther Kerr Rushtoi

5 thoughts on “Is It Worth It?

  1. Mark Evans

    Thank you for sharing your heart and the poem. I was blessed and encouraged in remembering I am not alone in my struggles. May God continue to bless and guide you and your family as you seek to serve Him. He will never leave or forsake you. In Him , Mark Evans 

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